BrrrBrrrrBrrrrBrrrBrrrBrrrrBrrr...

This morning I woke up to the BrrrBrrrrBrrrrBrrrBrrrBrrrrBrrr... of a large engine just outside our window. It drives me crazy.

But we are used to it, it is usually caused by huge buses that bring the Russians to the Monastery - our neighbour. I’ve been planning to throw eggs at the next tourist bus that stops outside our window with the engine running. But we were out of eggs today so I just got up and went out.

It was not a big tourist bus but a greenish-brown big van of some weird kind.
I stormed up to the drivers side and motioned with my hands for him to switch the engine off. He just shrugged so I knocked on the window, which he opened reluctantly:

“Do you speak English?” I asked not so sweetly (I find that if I want to demand something then English is the best language in this country, very few people will try to argue with you which they definitely will if you speak Hebrew)

“No” said the man who looked like 12 years old in green clothes.

“NO?! So how did the f… did you understand what I was saying?” I said angrily.

(For those of you who do not know, I HATE being woken up. It will drive me insane and only with a huge amount of self control will I be able to be civilized to the person who has woken me up – this was not the case now)

“Ok, I speak little” said the green clothed boy-man in a quiet voice.

“Can you switch the engine off, please? I said (the “please” I had force my tongue to squeeze in there, so it probably sounded more like “Can you switch the engine off, mnkppleeasenmkh?”)

“Lama?” said the boy-man (and he was not trying to insult me by calling me a Lama, lama means “Why?” in Hebrew, but this ignorant small question was like salt to a smarting cut)

I exploded: “LAMA?! Because I am trying to sleep five meters from this noise and there are lots of fumes from this big car-thing!!! You've had it running for an hour now!! Have you never heard of the ENVIRONMENT?!?”

“sorry…” the green little man-boy whispered and switched the engine off.

I later found out it was some kind of army truck and needless to say, just two minutes after my explosion I was suffering from deep guilt for giving this poor army boy (who is probably literally having a hell of a time now and just daydreaming of beaches, big boobs and bongs) heatstroke in the burning car-thing outside.