What and Why

There is of course a lot of research about depression and there are many kinds but the three most common are Major Depression, Dysthymia, and Bipolar Disorder.

Major depression is a combination of symptoms that interfere with the ability to work, sleep, eat, or enjoy anything. Some people have a single episode of depression, but many have episodes that recur.

Dysthymia is a less severe type of depression that lasts a long time but involves less severe symptoms. A person with dysthymia will probably lead a normal life, but may not be functioning well or feeling good. People with dysthymia may also experience major depressive episodes.

Bipolar Disorder (also called manic-depression) is another. Bipolar disorder is thought to be less common than other depressive disorders. If you are bipolar you have cycling mood swings - usually severe highs (mania) and lows (depression). The mood swings are sometimes dramatic and rapid, but usually are more gradual. When in the depressed stage, a person can have any or all of the symptoms of a depressive disorder. When in the manic stage, the individual may be overactive, over talkative, and have a great deal of energy. Mania affects thinking, judgment, and social behaviour, sometimes in ways that cause serious problems and embarrassment. A person in a manic phase may feel elated, full of grand schemes that might range from unwise business decisions to romantic sprees. Mania, left untreated, may worsen to a psychotic state, where the person is out of touch with reality.

According to scientists there are three factors that may be the cause of depression, the factors are biological, genetic or environmental.

Biological - hormones for instance. Or it could be that one has an imbalance in the neurotransmitters serotonin or norepinephrine, these are natural substances that allow our brain cells to communicate with each other.

Genetic – difficult to point out what and why and how, but pi-polar disorder is one of the depressions that has a strong connection to heredity.

Environmental factors – normal but tough stuff that happens in life can cause depression, death, break-ups or stress are some of those things that can affect you.

For me these things, that I just told you about, were once important.

WHAT? WHY?

The “what” I refused to acknowledge until I spent a lot of time with a friend who was suffering from post-natal depression. To try to help her I found a book for about Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. Since she was too “gone” to read, I read it for her.
The more I read the more I began to realise that the book was for me.
The list of symptoms was like a blue-print for my life, a description of my universe.

The “why” was imprinted in me, just look at my movies. Not only would I watch movies of things to come but I always watched movies about moments that had passed. Things that were no more and could have been done differently…

It doesn’t really help, you know, to think “I should have said this and that…” or "he hit me because I am not a likable person" it only makes matters worse.
But for me it was a simple reason to why I felt blue - I was a failure and therefore I should feel low.