Phone Call from Mum

- Hello my sweet daughter! I’m reading a good book and it reminds me of you!
- Ok? What book is it?
- You know Rubinstein?
- Ehh…well… there are a few Rubinstein’s. Which one do you mean?
- Oy sweetie! You know the pianist!
- Ok?! So you are reading a book about the pianist and it reminds you of me?! I don’t even play the piano.
- Noo! It’s not about him! It’s a cookbook!
- Ok?!? And the cookbook reminds you of me?
- Nooo!! Sweetie! It’s written by Rubinstein’s wife…
- Ok?! So you are reading a cookbook written by Rubinstein’s wife that reminds you of me?
- No! Well you know Rubenstein, he is a pianist!
- Yes! But I thought we were talking about cooking?
- Yes, but the cookbook is written by his wife!
- Ok, I’ve got that now. But why does it remind you of me?
- Rubenstein is Jewish by the way.
- Yes? So?
- Well, he had a lot of mistresses, even though he was married.
- Mhm? So where do I get into this picture?
- Well, I was thinking of your boyfriend…
- Hmm…So what are you trying to say? That just because I have a Jewish boyfriend he will have a lot of mistresses?
- NOOOO! No! You know I love Jewish people!
- Ok. So you are saying that just because my boyfriend is a musician he will have a lot of mistresses?
- No! No!
- But I don’t understand mummy?! Are you saying that just because my boyfriend is from Israel AND a musician he will have a lot of mistresses?
- No no no! I was just reminded of you when I read about Rubinstein because he married his first big love and she was much older than him, as you are older than your boyfriend.
- Ok! So you think that just because I am older than my boyfriend he will have a lot of mistresses?
- No no! You don’t understand me!
- No I don’t.
- Well, Rubinstein was married for over 40 years and then he left his first wife at the age of 90 for a much younger woman.
- Ok, but they were married for more than 40 years?
- Yes.
- Were they happily married for 40 years?
- I don’t know.
- But anyway, why did this remind you of me?
- Well, they are bohemians both of them your boyfriend and him…
- Ok? And?
- Well I don’t want you to be unhappy…
- But mummy if I have 40 happy years with one love then I would be pretty pleased.
- Yes but…maybe you can find someone who is not a bohemian, like a doctor or a lawyer or someone…
- So, what are you telling me? That doctors and lawyers do not have mistresses?
- No, but at least you will have money…