How do you stop time?

I am still stuck in February or March.

I get a shock every time I see the date. What is going on?

BrrrBrrrrBrrrrBrrrBrrrBrrrrBrrr...

This morning I woke up to the BrrrBrrrrBrrrrBrrrBrrrBrrrrBrrr... of a large engine just outside our window. It drives me crazy.

But we are used to it, it is usually caused by huge buses that bring the Russians to the Monastery - our neighbour. I’ve been planning to throw eggs at the next tourist bus that stops outside our window with the engine running. But we were out of eggs today so I just got up and went out.

It was not a big tourist bus but a greenish-brown big van of some weird kind.
I stormed up to the drivers side and motioned with my hands for him to switch the engine off. He just shrugged so I knocked on the window, which he opened reluctantly:

“Do you speak English?” I asked not so sweetly (I find that if I want to demand something then English is the best language in this country, very few people will try to argue with you which they definitely will if you speak Hebrew)

“No” said the man who looked like 12 years old in green clothes.

“NO?! So how did the f… did you understand what I was saying?” I said angrily.

(For those of you who do not know, I HATE being woken up. It will drive me insane and only with a huge amount of self control will I be able to be civilized to the person who has woken me up – this was not the case now)

“Ok, I speak little” said the green clothed boy-man in a quiet voice.

“Can you switch the engine off, please? I said (the “please” I had force my tongue to squeeze in there, so it probably sounded more like “Can you switch the engine off, mnkppleeasenmkh?”)

“Lama?” said the boy-man (and he was not trying to insult me by calling me a Lama, lama means “Why?” in Hebrew, but this ignorant small question was like salt to a smarting cut)

I exploded: “LAMA?! Because I am trying to sleep five meters from this noise and there are lots of fumes from this big car-thing!!! You've had it running for an hour now!! Have you never heard of the ENVIRONMENT?!?”

“sorry…” the green little man-boy whispered and switched the engine off.

I later found out it was some kind of army truck and needless to say, just two minutes after my explosion I was suffering from deep guilt for giving this poor army boy (who is probably literally having a hell of a time now and just daydreaming of beaches, big boobs and bongs) heatstroke in the burning car-thing outside.

Lemons and Blossom

I spoke to my sweet mother the other day and she asked "Why oh why can't you come and live in Sweden..."

I just said "How can I? When the almond trees are blossoming and the lemons are perfectly ripe on the branches for me to pick..."

Herb Garden

After planning an amazing trip to the desert and failing tragically, (see desktop image) I decided to comfort myself with planting a herb garden just outside our door.

All went well, bought earth and pots and found most of the herbs I wanted - Mint, Flat-leaf Parsley, Chives, Oregano (the fat velvety kind) and Zatar.

Zatar is a spice mix and is hugely popular here, made from zatar, olive oil and sesame seeds.

Now the complicated part of this mix is the main ingredient, zatar, which no one knows the English name for. I have been told by various experts in the field (and all emphasize that his/her knowledge is the truth) that zatar is one of the following: Oregano, Salvia, Marjoram, Hyssop or "wintersweet"?!

After a lot of hard work comparing pictures on google, I can now tell you the answer: Zatar is Sweet Marjoram or maybe it is Wild Marjoram, anyway it is of the Marjoram family and a lovely plant of which ever it is, is growing in my garden now.

I still have to add two very essential spices, Basil and Thyme before my garden is complete.

Before I show you my beautiful garden as it looked this morning, I will tell you how I use these spices:

Mint - great for a lot of different things: mint tea, mint sauce for hot indian dishes like samosas, lemonade and my favorite current drink - strawberry smoothies.

Flat-leafed parsley - I like it much more than the curly parsley. Great for all sallads (especially tabouleh) when fresh, in omelets, and in all soups when dried.

Chives - (sv. gräslök). Great in yogurt based sauces, as sprinkle on sandwiches and in home made cream cheese.

Oregano - of course a major part of all Italian dishes but also in omelets. The dried spice taste a lot more than when it is fresh, so with eggs I prefer to use fresh oregano.

Marjoram - amazing taste explosion in your mouth when dried and sprinkled over feta cheese with olive oil; and with eggs both fresh and dried.

This is what my beautiful herb garden looked like this morning:

Yes! It is snow and hailstone!
My beautiful herb garden has temporarily moved
to my bathtub for now.

Market Day

Once a week I try to go to the market in the city to do our grocery shopping. It is cheaper and always much more colourful than the big supermarkets.

Vegetables are among the few things here that are cheaper than in Sweden, BUT only in season. Off-season the price is shocking or else it is impossible to get. Unlike Sweden where we can buy most vegetables and fruit all year round and the prices don't vary too much inspite of season.

Meat, fish, dairy products and bread are all more expensive here than in Sweden.

A few exmples of how much stuff costs:

Milk 1 litre: 6-8 NIS = 12-16 SEK = 1-1,5 EURO
1 loaf of bread: 15 NIS = 30 SEK = 2,9 EURO
5 pita bread: 4 NIS = 8 SEK = 0,8 EURO
12 eggs: 16 NIS = 32 SEK = 3 EURO
12 eggs organic (Sv. ekologiska): 22 NIS = 42 SEK = 4,2 EURO
Lemons per kilo: 4 NIS = 8 SEK = 0,8 EURO
Lemons per kilo: OFF SEASON 26 NIS = 52 SEK = 5 EURO
Tomatos per kilo: 2-4 NIS = 4-8 SEK = 0,4-0,8 EURO

I buy vegetables in the Iraqi part of the market

Spices, oils and teas

Nuts, drieds fruit and grains

Kitchenware

I never eat crackers, but I like the idea of buying crackers by weight.

You have H&M - we have the market.

Breakfast

I love staying in Jerusalem over the weekends. It is the time where I write, sew, read, walk, eat nice and healthy or unhealthy.

This will be one of those weekends and here is how it always starts:

Poached eggs

Working Girl part 2

It was after my first day at work.
My head was overloaded with information and the sun was hot. It might also have been that the three layers of clothes I was wearing, from the morning in Jerusalem which had been very chilly, were a bit too much for one o’clock afternoon in Tel Aviv.

The loved one called and said that he was on his way to pick me up. I said I would get a sandwich and wait for him by the petrol station on the main road.

This I did.

Got a sandwich and sat down on a low wall under a small olive tree that grew next to the petrol station. They were rebuilding the road and the area. The olive tree belonged to a small group of olive trees forming a tiny little park next to the dusty big road.

I sat reading some papers minding my own business when a red car suddenly drives up on to the pavement and stops next to me.

The window unfurls itself and inside I see a dwarf or is the politically correct term “little person”? I know I shouldn’t use “midget”.
But anyway, this tiny man of about fifty was standing in front of his steering wheel and he looked out the window and asked me in Hebrew (I will put a translation in brackets):

- Kama? (How much?)
- Slihka? (Sorry?)
- Kama? (How much?)
- What?!
- Ahhh… ein Hevrit? (Ahhh...no Hebrew?)
- Lo. (No)
- Russit? (Russian?)
- Lo. (No)
- Anglit? (English?)
- Yes
- Ahh ok… So how much?
- How much for what?!?!

The minute man with the big head looked a bit confused for a bit and then he turned bright red. I on the other hand was laughing my head off.

- Eh, I am sorry? You not work…I mean live here?
- Here? In the park? Next to the road? No.
- Ah…oh…I am very very sorry. I think you work, I mean live here…
- Well, no I am sorry but I don’t.
- Ah, so what are you doing here?
- I am waiting for my boyfriend to pick me up.
- Oh, I am sorry. I will go now. I am very very sorry I think you are… I mean Sometimes I need… I am so sorry…
- Don’t worry about it! Better luck next time!

Then he laughed in a relieved sort of way and drove off.

The loved one was very sore with me afterwards for passing up on little person sex ;)